I saw a really interesting post on my friend Annmarie’s instagram this week (see her at @iamannmariemurray on instagram), and one of the lines she said that hit me between the eyes was “If you keep pretending you’re ok when you’re not, nothing changes. Not the heaviness, not the overthinking, Not the feeling that you’re watching your life instead of living it”

That really resonated with me because I remember that feeling of watching my life instead of living it. Doing things on autopilot because it was the done thing, or the expected thing or the obligation. This is how I felt years ago before I started on this journey of healing. I didn’t really get genuinely excited as often. I felt overwhelmed and like I was merely surviving -- getting from one day to the next, from one urgent fire to the next. Sometimes it felt like the colour had gone out of life, and in a way it had. Because I was living in someone else’s black and white painting rather than using my own vibrant colour.

It’s so easy to fall into this pattern of doing things on autopilot and doing what’s expected of you, because of how we are conditioned by society. So if any of this is resonating with you — DO NOT….I REPEAT…DO NOT BEAT YOURSELF UP!!!

What brings me joy?

Just ask yourself — where do I feel like I’m watching my life instead of living it? Start with what brings colour back in to your life. Something that’s just to bring you joy — no other purpose. That might be a gentle yoga class that will focus on breathing rather than it being an exercise chore. It might be taking up a hobby you abandoned when life got too serious. It might be socialising in a different way. It might be a good book. It might be a hot bath. Whatever it is, you choose.

By choosing one small path to joy, you’re choosing to live your life rather than watching it pass you by. That choice alone is powerful because you’re shifting your energy, you’re setting the intention that you want to make a change.

It doesn’t have to be complex or the "done thing", it just needs to be consistent and right for YOU.

If you are stuck and don’t know where to start — get in touch. I can help you.

Until next time,

Le grá,